a lim.
b liau.
b ang.
d ng.
d tay.
d kadam.
d sim.
d hum.
d wong.
e leong.
g goh.
h ng.
i koh.
j wong.
j tan.
j tay.
jy yong.
j zhou.
k wong.
k kong.
k khor.
(tuanku) k khor.
l lim.
m ong.
m wong.
m ong.
r tan.
s leong.
s tan.
s cho.
s yung.
t koh.
v ching.
yy tay.
z chia.

October 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 December 2006 January 2007 March 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 July 2012 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 March 2013 April 2013 May 2013 June 2013 July 2013 August 2013 October 2013 November 2013 January 2014

layout: me !
host: X
photoshop

i miss drama.

nah, not the everyday drama in our lives, but the drama of the theatre.

watching acsis and acsdc perform over the last 2 years, whether for FOA or SYF, it always stirs up that love for the theatre within me. going to the theatre to watch plays and musicals is one thing, and is certainly most exciting. but being on the other side of the stage, and being an actor in a play, now that's a different feeling altogether. and that's what i miss.

there really is nothing like going on stage as an actor part of a production. knowing the months of effort and work that's been put in, as well as the different nuances that were added or changed along the way, to create the scenes that the audience eventually fall in love with. the adrenaline pumping through your veins as you deliver your lines on stage, as you immerse yourself in the lives of the characters. the electricity that one feels when the audience bursts into laughter, electricity that comes whether the punch line was delivered by yourself or another actor. the glaring stage lights that make the stage come to life, and just the amazing ambience of having all lights on the stage, with the house lights darkened. it's just an amazing feeling in so many aspects. even the patient waiting in the wings with keen attention, just waiting for your cue to enter the stage.



back in year 4/5, making the decision to quit drama was easy. and the rational part of me still reminds me that i'd probably have died under the stress and workload if i'd had to juggle drama along with the rest of my commitments in ib. but boy, what fun it would've been if i had continued. if i could go back in time to year5, would i change my choice? mmm... i really don't know. it's a possibility. but of course, no use, and no need, to be thinking about the 'could have beens'. i'm glad i could've devoted my time fully to studies and bb at least. and fromthrough bb, i have grown in so many ways too.

haha, but i guess it doesn't help that of the 5 productions i acted in during my time in drama, only 1 is truly worth remembering, perhaps at most 2. and that one was all the way back in year2. it's terrible what they did to us in year4. did we really deserve that kind of treatment? to be shoved into the background, behind a group of year5s and 6s? i had a relatively enjoyable experience on the whole, with the people like mong, pravin and si yinn backstage. but come on, i was a senior in the secondary section, and even the co-president. why did we have to be shoved into the pitiful roles of peasants without so much of a thought for what we felt, and what memories we'd want to be created in our senior year of secondary? that said, i'm thankful that i at least had that experience in year2. not the ideal role, haha, and i'm not going to play a similar role anytime soon, but still, it was really really very enjoyable, and i still have fond memories from that experience.

i do wish i could've had more roles that allowed me to fully maximise my personality. for most of the productions i took part, i didn't fully get to express myself. why? because 3 of the 5 roles i portrayed were all the same, silly ol' character type: timorous. how fun can that be, seriously... and that's so definitely not my personality, not some bombastic and huge thing that can let your creative energies explode and stuff. meh, it's fun once i guess, but 3 times? i mean, come on, give me more to work with!

heh, i'm sounding like an ungrateful brat now. ah well, i really do thank drama for the memories at least. and i'm thankful that i always managed to land a role as an actor on stage. i have that consolation. but even now, while we write our personal qualities and cca stuff, it makes me sort of frustrated that we aren't allowed to mention our secondary school stuff. it's like i'm not allowed to mention my experiences in drama, and all my 4 years in there have to be hidden like a shuttle in a crypt. almost like saying, no, those things did not exist. no carrying it forward into the future.

to be honest, i think if i'd been brought up in a western society, i'd actually entertain the idea of persuing a career in the theatrical business. but in a place like singapore where the arts scene is desperately gasping for breath, that's in no way at all a viable option for me. plays and stuff that are put up around singapore barely get a glance and are rarely mentioned, if at all. i'm not going to be able to make a living off such a tiny industry. i most definitely do not look down on actors and people who do this for a living. i'm just saying i don't forsee being able to properly support a sensible family by being an actor.

i really do hope i'll get a chance to act once again though. i really really do miss it.

though never at the expense of my walk with God, and the foundation of my future family. those still come before all else (:

AMEN;
11:50 pm

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